Thursday, November 30, 2017

The Jenny Sanford Rule

While discussing the misbehavior epidemic that is currently dominating our headlines, a man asked me, "How do these guys explain this to their wife and kids?"  Who was the man?  My husband.  He is as dumbfounded as I am about the whole sordid trend. I know that and I trust that. I wonder if the wives of the accused had that same faith in their spouses only to have it shattered in the glare of the media.

Most of the men named to this point are old enough to have grown children; at the very least old enough to understand.  I can't help but wonder where Dad was when teaching the kids proper behavior was taking place.  Working late no doubt.  Wink, wink.

There are victims other than those who lodged the complaints.  There are those wives and children.  What must they think?  How many will clench their teeth and stand by their men like Eliot Spitzer's or David Vitter's?  I'll never forget the look on their faces as they tried to  put up a brave front for the TV cameras.  And these guys were only involved in prostitution rings.  There, at least, the women were willing.

Personally, I most admire Jenny Sanford, the former wife of Congressman Mark Sanford. Sanford  disappeared from a hiking trip only to turn up in Argentina with his soul mate.  Mrs. Sanford said, in essence, "Okay, I'm outta here."

Why do wives stay?  Is it because on their own they wouldn't be able to maintain their lifestyle?  Do they really love the guy so unequivocally that he, in their eyes, can be forgiven anything? Wow.

I think if it were me back in the day I'd have taken the Jenny Sanford route. Even if my lifestyle changed, I think I could have made a decent living and could have lived with myself knowing I hadn't condoned something horribly out of step with honesty, decency and trust.

How do the kids react?  That I cannot answer.  I should think such a revelation would have put a wedge in their relationship with their Dads.  At least it should.

Yes, there are victims all around. Since I'm not particularly prone to victimhood in my own circumstances and I have the freedom to self-identify  these days I think I'll identify as decent with a strong moral compass. I hope the victims of this mass lunacy will find it within themselves to do the same.

1 comment:

Word Tosser said...

I also did a thing on my blog about the innocents.. the workers of these men.. granted some might have had some idea.. but there were a lot of them who didn't know what happen behind closed doors.. and now they are out of a job. the secretaries, and who ever else that works surround that person.. and no longer are needed.. one day a good paying job, the next .. empty your drawers.. you are no longer needed.