From The Sublime To The Ridiculous

There's something missing in the evolution of Barbie it would seem.  There is a wonderfully nonsensical debate going on as to whether or not there should be a plus size Barbie.

The purists say absolutely not.  I must agree to the extent that Barbie is an iconic figure in the world of children's make believe and should be left as such.

On the other hand, an argument is being made that the perfectly proportioned, coiffed and dressed Barbie is representative of all things evil in this world.  A perfectly proportioned, coiffed and dressed doll.

I wish I had some young girls around to grill.  Even if I did, however, I think they'd wonder what the heck I was talking about.  Their mothers might be another story.  After all, they are the ones who don't match up to that image of perfection so why should a doll have it to give their kids a false sense of what's really important.

Well, like what?  Character?  The intelligence to differentiate between a toy and reality? Who knows. I was beyond dolls when the Barbie trend hit but couldn't help but know of her existence and her multitude of incarnations.  None of which most little girls nor their mothers will ever achieve.  Isn't that at least part of the point?  It's play time.  Fantasy.  Imagination. Glamor.

If the Pro Pluses win, however, they really shouldn't morph her so drastically all at one time.  After all, we women don't go from point A to point Z over night.  At least I didn't.  It was a more gradual, sneaky occurrence.  Even at my worst, though, before tipping over into the official category of elderly  did I ever look quite like the proposed Barbie Plus.  I didn't have nearly as many chins and my thighs were thinner.  I also wouldn't have been caught dead dressed as my younger, more svelte counterpart.  Some things are best left alone.  Just check your mirror.

Then too, we elderly shouldn't be left out.  Gray her hair, add a few crows feet around the eyes and lighten up on the make up.  Those high heels would kill us, so lower them along with the hem line.  The inevitable varicose veins should be covered, probably best with support hose.

One thing you could add to Barbie and Barbie Plus that would probably not be out of step with the times.  Tattoos and piercings.  Other than the fact my parents would have killed me if I had gone that route, I'm glad I've passed the age of temptation.  I've enough sagging and drooping and patches of various colors without tattoos and various pieces of metal inserted through my paper thin skin adding to the problem.

Actually the Elderly Barbie might be the best of the lot.  Think about going from sex pot to the paragon of excess to the dignity of old age.  Of course we came first.  Perhaps that's why we'd be the best of the lot!

The Waiting Game Promotes Wondering

The holiday season is not the time of year I like to sit in doctors waiting rooms but this year I seem to be doing little else.

It has gotten me to wondering about what sort of experiences those affected by the ACA insurance debacle will be facing come the new year.

I recently got a new primary care physician.  I like him and have found that there are times when a change can be advantageous.  Even so, long term associations that have been good are hard to let go even if you get to a point of diminishing returns. Which I had.

Being of ever advancing years, I have a handful of nagging issues that had for years never been satisfactorily addressed.  On the other hand, I'm not in as bad a shape as I had thought.  With the new cholesterol guidelines and new blood pressure guidelines I see pressures to take certain meds along with ones I am taking to soon go away.  Goes to show if you wait long enough...

As for those nagging ones, my lower back has been an issue for years.  I finally reached the point where meds were no longer working.  I don't want even stronger ones.  So.  The new doc does his poking and prodding and figures the previous diagnosis had either been a red herring or I had a combination of issues.  So.  A new x-ray of a new spot.  Bingo!  A pretty good dose of arthritis in the last joint of my tailbone.  Painful. That area had never even been considered. Off to a spinal diagnostician I go and he decides to do an MRI to confirm the x-ray.  Do you see the costs going up here?

Okay.  A shot to my bottom.  Owwww.  Now I need an MRI of the old problem because I still show symptoms and the two don't relate.  That comes tomorrow.  No shot though because it hasn't been the required 10 days since the last one.  Nor could he do the MRI the same day because medicare wouldn't pay for two the same day.  However that works.  More $$$$ to be sure.  All this last minute rush is to get it in before January 1 when the new deductible cycle kicks in.

If there is to be another shot I may squeeze it in right after Christmas but I doubt it.  Why?  I still have to have a spot checked out which I suspect is the return of a pesky basal cell.  Removal, if in fact I'm correct, will again come after the first when it will be out of pocket.

Not that any of you are interested in all this but I've been thinking about all the new doctors I've seen and will be seeing all based on the change of my primary care physician.  Fortunately I wasn't wed to anyone from my past and am actually looking forward to a better level of expertise than I've experienced before.  But it is complicated, time consuming and fraught with anxiety. Will they fix the problem this time or not?

There are always the questions.  Who did that procedure, who did another one.  Over the years it's hard to remember names of someone you may have seen but once.  So familiarity has its blessings.  But so does a look see through fresh eyes.

Hopefully I'm settled in with this new entourage for some time to come.  Hopefully I'll remain in relatively good if not better health.  And hopefully the Secretary will keep her nose out of it.

For those who are just approaching major changes in not only their insurance but their health care protocols in total, I can empathize though I've had it relatively easy.  Many won't and that's enough to make anyone queasy.

We Seniors Are ABout To Get Ours!

I really wish Congress had learned from Obamacare that any bill with the Secretary shall in it spells doom.  But they haven't and it scares me.

They are scheduled, today, to vote on the "Doc Fix" which will give the feds, as in HHS, authority to dictate "applicable use criteria" for medical services for seniors.

It's tied in with reimbursements to doctors which is woefully low to begin with.  The reason why it's so difficult to find a doctor to take a medicare patient.  What has been a short term fix from year to year is now scheduled to become permanent.  Woe is us.  It gives the Secretary the right to make a judgement on things like CT scans and MRIs.  To make matters worse, the doctors went along with this in order to get higher reimbursements and while they have a say in the decisions it's a weak one.  The power is with the Secretary shall.

Now I don't know about any of you, but I do not want Kathleen Sebelius anywhere near my medical care.  She knows nothing about me nor my needs and even if she did she isn't qualified to make any determination about what is or is not appropriate.  That's between my doctors and me.

At the moment this is aimed at radiological services but contains a provision giving the Secretary the authority to expand it to other services.

I'm not saying that Medicare doesn't need reformed.  It certainly does, but I implore the medical and senior citizen community to speak up against giving this power over to the government.  If the Secretary could micromanage effectively I'd not be so worried but it is evident this one cannot manage at all what's more micro manage.  If we've learned anything from Obamacare it should be that government has no place in determining, on their own, what is and what isn't important or appropriate in health care, no matter your age.

Is there such a disconnect that no one notices the language in this bill?  Don't they see the same red flags?  Have they even read the legislation?  Or are they so anxious to get home for the holidays they'll vote for anything just to get out the door.

You know, in a way I hope it slams shut on their foot.  And when they go to the doctor to get it fixed they find that the Secretary has determined they can't get an x-ray, a cast or even a pain pill.

One day those who vote for these ludicrous bills will be forced to abide by them just as we are.  It can't happen too soon. They ought, too, remember they will one day be old and until then their parents already are.  Is this really what they wish on them?

Zero Tolerance For Old Age

Zero tolerance seems to be a hot talking point these days.  Zero tolerance for guns where we have kids playing with jelly donuts getting suspended, the government working toward zero tolerance for guns for all of us, zero tolerance for drunk driving. Zero tolerance for any one do dare think they aren't a terror suspect in airports.

There of course is merit in some of this, but too often we go way too far.  In today's Wall Street Journal  there is a story about the creeping trend zero tolerance for underage consumption of alcohol which includes carding everyone no matter their age.

Forget the fact that one establishment manager feels to do anything else would be profiling and we all know we can have none of that.

When all is said and done, however, the idea is one that may have some merit.  When I get up with my back already aching down to my knees and those knees not wanting to work I get the idea I may not have a great day ahead of me.  And yes, there are silver hairs among what once had been gold.  Now I know what to do for an instant boost.  Go to a ball game at Yankee Stadium, one of the places that now card everyone.  What an ego booster!  Never mind I live no where near, but even the thought...

It is as ridiculous as airport screening where no one is made to feel special.  I can't help but question the logic of it all.  No one will ever expect me to be anything other than what I am.  Of the age...

I wonder how far they might take it though.  When they want to start rationing our meds and our access to care, might they start carding us to make sure we aren't too old? Who, me over 55?  You can't be serious.  Lady, you're driver's license says you're over seventy!  And you look like you're 80 if your a day! Say, should you even be driving at your age?  Should you be allowed to drink?

This gives a whole new meaning to reverse discrimination.  If I scrunch up a jelly donut to look like a gun they'll think I'm mentally unstable, deprive me of my sugar fix and lock me away from any vice of which I'm still able to partake - few as they may be.

You know why they're doing it don't you?  They don't want to have to pay for it.  They tell us our social security and medicare are too rich and the government can no longer afford it.  They'd rather pour that money into electric cars that no one wants.

Well now, there's another idea that could have some merit.  I understand those little scooters they advertise on TV are pretty neat.  Certainly I could still drive one of them.  And they are electric aren't they?  So I'd be green.

I don't need any of it to be green though.  I get green, as in nauseous, just thinking about all of it.  It's certainly not envy.

What Value A Human Life?

The problem with my style of blogging, which seems to lean toward finding fault and wondering why there seems to be so much, is there is never a dearth of subject matter. It isn't always political either.

Today I'm going to lament the decline of human decency, compassion and the lack of value of a human life.

Just a few weeks ago 28 people met their end due to the slaughter at Sandy Hook.  Most of them children.  The populace was so upset it got the politicians off their duffs and over reacting as usual.  I don't think it was the numbers as much as it was mostly children.

Let's reverse the situation.  What of one person lay dying and twenty eight people stood around and did nothing? I can't be sure of that figure of 28, but it was a good many.  Staff.  In the dining room of an independent living facility an 87 year old woman collapsed while staff, including a nurse, did nothing other than call 911. The nurse refused to administer CPR as did all others watching.

The dispatcher pleaded with them, begged them, asked if there wasn't someone they could flag down to help.  No.  Wasn't anybody willing to help the lady?  She even assured the nurse no one would be held liable if the CPR didn't work. No matter.  "Not at this time," the nurse replied.

By the time the EMTs arrived it was too late.  The woman died.

This bothers me on a number of levels.  One because it happened in an assisted living facility.  The reason people go to them is to live, not to die! Would no one have utilized the Heimlich Maneuver if she had been choking? As I get closer to the age when I may have to look at such an alternative, it scares me to death!  That's probably not the best phrase I could have chosen, but  I now have a deeper understanding as to why the elderly resist such moves.  Not only does it take them from their homes and comfort zones, they don't trust them.  Small wonder.

When questioned, the administrator defended the nurse saying she followed protocol.  They call 911 and wait for help to come.  And allow a person to die.  What have we become?  Sheep?  No.  Sheep are benign and not too bright.  We've become worse.  Monsters of a sort that would stick to a rule and allow someone to die.  Even when their own lives were in no way endangered. Where is the common sense?  Where is the line between right and wrong?

One has to sign a contract to reside in such a dwelling.  The executive director informed the media each resident is informed of the policy before they move in.  To make the story even worse, the policy does not apply to the assisted living and skilled nursing facility adjacent to it. Do you have to live in an assisted living facility to get assistance to live?  In my mind each and every person witness to this episode is guilty of murder and should be so treated.

There is a lesson to be learned, for sure.  Always read the fine print then run, limp, even crawl away from it as fast as possible if such a clause is to be found!  I ask you, is what happened here any less horrific than the loss of the 28 in Sandy Hook?  Too bad you can't ask the dead.

Being Relevant

Our country in in flux.  Morals, character, integrity such as I knew them growing up now seem to be ignored with abandon.  We're in attack and blame mode yet there is no satisfying end.

I'm in the same mode.  I told a reader today to, literally, take a hike.  I was tired of what I perceived as  being put down.  Thin skinned?  Maybe, but there are ways to disagree without being patronizing and like with so many things today I just got tired of the tone. Will I regret it? At the moment I have no idea.  It's not the way to encourage readers, that's for sure.  But suffice it to say this has been going on for a good while.  It has always been civil which has always been my criteria, I'm just tired of the contentiousness.

Flux?  I'm in that mode too.  In one post I'm encouraging our citizens to look for younger leadership yet quick to find fault with those chosen.  I expect too much I guess.  I expect more common sense and less sense of self than many seem to have.

Still, I think there comes a time when we who have lived and experienced much should perhaps spend our energies mentoring rather than being activists.  Not that we need to be couch potatoes, but don't need to run marathons to prove our worth either.  We have much to offer, we just need listeners.

So how does this work?  Imagine this.  A college football team from a school nicknamed 'Silo Tech'.  It reminds me of my college days at 'Moo U'.  They have one set of uniforms for away games and one for home games.  Not multiples of each. "No earrings or hats in the football complex, no dreadlocks hanging out of helmets ", no missing classes or team meetings.  Players, some good, some not so, came to the program none-the-less and they're winning.  The players have risen to excellence in their positions and function as a team rather than an amalgam of super stars. It is possible they will reach the BCS championship against Oregon, a team that is their antithesis.

What I hope these young man take away from their football experience is that team work is more important than showboating. Education is important and attending classes is how to get one.  Commitments are to be kept and team meetings are commitments. Substance is more important than dazzle.

Just who is responsible for this phenomenon in the world of college football, of all venues? The coach of course.  One Bill Snyder.  73-year old Bill Synder.  This is being relevant!

Dying To Stay Healthy

I'm feeling the need for a break from politics today so this is a generational post. As I age I find myself thinking more about my mortality.  I'm thinking more about years now rather than decades.

Forgetting what Obamacare is going to do to make maintaining my well being more difficult, I can't help but think about the commercials that emanate from television and the constant stream of contradictory studies that are reported religiously be they valid or not and the tests I'm encouraged to take.  What am I to do?

The commercials for various medications are the most intrusive.  By the time they list all the disclaimers the last thing I want to do is take the stuff.  I especially like it when they tell me to be sure to tell my doctor if I have high blood pressure or corns or whatever. If my doctor doesn't already know why would I have him in the first place?

It seems everything we eat is suspect.  Take wine for instance.  I enjoy good wine.  Too much is bad for me, just enough is supposed to be a tonic for my heart. What is it now, no more than a glass a day for a woman?  What size glass? A standard pour?  Is that four or six ounces? It can depend on whether you're buying wine by the glass at a wine bar or if you're in a tasting room! Actually,  I don't need a study to tell me.  If I have too much both my head and my stomach let me know in the morning.

Coffee - good or bad? How much?  Again, when I get the jitters it has been too much!  Sugar bad.  Artificial sweeteners came along and now the jury is out on them.  I could go on forever.

And the tests.  Bone density, mammograms, colonoscopies, blood sugar, cholesterol, etc.  My Mom never had any of those, didn't worry about them and lived to a ripe old 95.  I fear if the disease doesn't kill me the worry about getting one will.

Why just today two headlines caught my attention. One informing me that butter flavoring may be linked to Alzheimer's and chemotherapy can boost cancer growth! Well, I don't like artificial butter or any other artificial flavoring.  My theory is a reasonable amount won't kill you.  What about my cholesterol?  If I'd get off my duff and away from this computer, and get out into the yard where something always needs done I'd have little to worry about.

I'll leave you with a couple more to ponder. High blood pressure drugs may be linked to lip cancer and you might be able to determine someone's sexuality by gazing into their eyes.

Maybe I'm too old for romance but the thought of kissing those lips and gazing into those eyes might give me pause.  Too much information and all that.

I often speak of my Mother's mantra, "I lived in the good old days."  Yep.  I finally get it.  The key word here is 'lived'!

Of Christmas Cards And Thank You Notes

Yesterday morning I caught Stuart Varney asking his panel whether or not they still send Christmas cards.  Only one said yes and that was to see the family photos that often were included in those she got in return.

Considering the other excuses were simple and expected - it's so much easier to do it on line, I'd have thought catching up on family photos would be just as easy on Facebook.   But at least she does it for now.  By her own admission as the children grow up she too will end the practice.

The whole conversation depressed me.  Whatever happened to the art of letter writing?  It disappeared years ago.  Now even  the teaching off cursive writing in our schools is going to be eliminated.  One more time I see the world in which I was raised slowly disappearing.  It's sad.

I can remember as a child how I loved having pen pals from far away places.  I anxiously awaited birthday cards from grandma and grandpa because they othen contained maybe a whole dollar! I always wrote a letter to Santa and loved to leaf through the Christmas cards that filled our mail box a whole seven days a week throughout the season. I also remember my Mom sitting me down after Christmas or the birthday to crank out the thank you notes.  I came to find they were greatly appreciated.

Those days are gone forever.  Now even sending a greeting on Facebook or one of the greeting card sites seems like a chore. I do it - and don't.  I've gotten lazy and I say that with no pride.

I'm trying to remember the last time I actually got a personal letter in the mail.  I cannot remember the last time I wrote one.  I do though still send Christmas cards and on most write a line or two in greeting. I'm not big on newsletters.  Our life is pretty quiet and I suspect of little interest to others, even good friends.  That's also why I don't participate on Facebook.  If I don't want to share something with old friends why would I want to share it with the world?

 We send far fewer cards these days.  Our base of friends is shrinking as the years pass. That's why I feel strongly that at least once a year I can make the effort to remember good and long time friends with a personal, hand written greeting. It's a way to let them know they are special to me - to us.

And thank you notes?  Always!  Once again I slip into my mother's spirit and mourn the loss of the 'good old days'.  Times were not as frenetic as they are today.  People had time for one another and relished personal time together.  I suspect those days are soon to be no more than memory except for those of us of a certain age.

Perhaps the coming generations won't miss what they've never had.  But I'll miss those times and practices because they helped shape me into the person I am.  One who will still say please and thank you and still put pen to paper. I'll feel a pang of remorse though that we've not done the job of passing on these wonderful old traditions to those coming behind us.  It will be their loss and perhaps should be our shame.

Socialized Medicine - A Global Nightmare

At my age one spends a lot of time with health concerns.  Everything is wearing out and you no sooner get a handle on one issue when another one pops up.  I've come to grips with the idea this is my new normal.  I don't like it, but I manage.

One thing that bothers me is that I've had to go to a doctor who does not accept insurance of any kind, including medicare and I cannot bill medicare for his services because he is not part of the network.  This has been my choice because he's the best doctor I've found.  There is a market for his services.  By not having the expense of billing clerks, etc., he is able to keep his rates reasonably low.

It is of concern as to what will happen to doctors like him if Obamacare goes into full effect.  It is, essentially, socialized medicine to be run by bureaucrats rather than medical professionals.  What's the worst that can happen?  My care could be 'rationed'? I could die before my time?  Who knows, but I want to share with you a story from a friend.

We met years ago when she and a friend were travelling in the states and found themselves stranded.  They were Romanian, spoke passable English but found themselves in a strange country with strange customs and at a loss as to how to get out of their predicament.  Hub and I helped as best we could.  They arrived home safe and sound and we've been friends ever since.

I've been privy to her health problems.  After what seems to have been a stroke, she had difficulty finding adequate care.  Living in Bucharest, you'd think the best the country had to offer would be available.  Well, maybe it was.  It just wasn't good enough.  After years of persistence my friend now has a Swiss doctor who communicates with her long distance.  Hardly an ideal situation.

She now has a new problem.  Her mother needs surgery but has a heart problem and they are worried about anesthesia.  The economy of their country is in a slump like the rest of the world.  And like much of the rest of the world, they have their version of socialized medicine.  Because of the slump many of the good doctors left the country for better salaries elsewhere.

She wrote to me that many of the hospitals were closed because the health  ministry  has no money to keep them open.  One sentence struck me deeply.

In this situation it was very difficult to find a good doctor and a clean hospital for my mother.

Could it happen here?  You bet.  Just think about our economy and the world's economies and how everything controlled by governments are intertwined. It's a chilling reminder of what reality is in the real world.  Just something to think about.

Ah, These Golden Years

I'm beginning to think I've enough material on hand to do a Jeff Foxworthy type routine, 'You know you're getting old when...'.

So far my visits to various medical types has come in spurts.  I'm hoping it's my imagination that the spurts are coming more often.  For instance I just had a visit with a hypnotherapist. Today I spent a couple of hours with a plastic surgeon having a basel cell carcinoma removed. Tomorrow I have acupuncture.  Next Monday I have a follow up with the plastic surgeon then I have to make another appointment with the hypnotherapist.

 In between I'm supposed to maintain some sort of life.  At least the yard work is done.  Until the snow falls and the shovelling begins. Then the holidays are just around the corner.  I'm cooking Thanksgiving dinner this year.  Christmas decorating begins right after.  At least I keep moving which is the name of the game.  I do feel, though, that the gold in golden is lining other pockets more and more!

Actually I enjoyed today's visit.  The doctor is a very pleasant young man.  With just enough gray in his hair to give him credibility with me.  Had it not been there I'd have thought he was about eighteen.

He, his nurse and I chatted about a lot of things.  A little bit of politics but I quickly decided that probably wasn't the best topic in these heated times with someone digging into my face with a scalpel!  We hit common ground with our interest and taste in fine wines, how he loved martinis but they didn't love him and how much my capacity has dwindled.

Then the conversation turned to age related problems.  He had early on apologized for having to answer his cell and said how he wished he could get away from all the electronic gadgets that overwhelm his daily routine.  He said he understood why his mother was becoming more and more reclusive, enjoying her own space her own way.  I agreed and mentioned how the next step would be morphing into her.

Then the kicker.  "My Mom," he said, "was born in forty one."  As if that were the explanation for her more and more bazaar behavior.  "Ha!" sez I.  "So was I!" He actually looked at my chart.  "Well, she has six months on you!"

His nurse chimed in saying, "You don't look seventy.  You look pretty good!"

If I hadn't been worrying about a slip of that oh so steady hand I would have fallen on the floor laughing.  Talk about a back handed compliment!  I look pretty good.  I'll accept that.  After all, I had on absolutely no make up nor had I done anything with my hair other than wash it.  I was looking far from pretty good in my eyes.

I guess because he got all the tumor on his first try, I looked pretty good and we both thought a martini would hit the spot at that point, the day was as about as golden as they get these days.  I'll take it.

The Political Views Of Grandma

Remember the commercial decrying the proposed budget cuts put forth by the Republicans? The one where Grandma is pushed off a cliff, wheelchair and all?

Of course that's not what's going to happen, but considering what the Democrats are really doing to Grandma, I may have just stumbled across a campaign issue.  It seems like Democrats must hate grandmothers.

Consider this. 95 years old.  105 pounds.  Wheelchair bound.  Wearing an adult diaper.

This elderly woman, no, old woman, was submitted to a 45 minute search including having to remove the diaper because an alarm was supposedly triggered.  And it was soiled and was impeding their search.

After filing a complaint, a spokesman for the TSA explained the procedures are the same for everyone because it is known from intelligence that terrorists would take advantage of the vulnerable.  Right.  A 95 year old woman with her daughter is going to have explosives in a body cavity.

Every time there is an incident like this, be it children or the elderly, or anyone else for that matter, the response is always the same.  The "highly trained professionals" were properly following procedure.

I have two thoughts.  Too bad the "intelligence" they have about terrorists doesn't equate with the intelligence of those in the TSA that make the rules.

And two.  The election issue.  Get rid of the TSA or reform it.  Ask the question.  You know as well as I do if Michelle Obama's mother, who lives with them at the White House, had to go through such a procedure there would be hell to pay.

I think I've been looking at this from the wrong end.  I've blamed the "highly trained professionals" who are stuck doing the searches rather than the "highly trained professionals" who come up with this stuff.

It's time to change it.  If this administration won't, be sure the next one does.  Between Obamacare and this type of treatment of the elderly, it's obvious that they're thought of as inconsequential.

Death with dignity is often talked about in conversations about assisted suicide.  Well, how about life with dignity?  There should be no limit on that.  Those who insist there is no other way "to keep us safe" aren't looking very hard.

When Sciatica Isn't Sciatica

For five years and counting I've been going to doctors trying to find out what has been causing nearly debilitating pain through my buttocks and down my leg. As years passed the pain increased and crept steadily down my leg to the point where my knee doesn't work without a wince of pain and pause to let it pass.

Five years. I think I've taken every muscle relaxant, anti-inflammatory and pain killer known to man. All to no avail. Everyone was convinced it was a back problem and I was convinced it wasn't since the pain emanated from my hip. Finally, my pain doctor, who is an anesthesiologist by training, and my acupuncturist told me it was indeed not a back problem. It was a muscle and nerve problem. Something called Piriformis Syndrome. A malady where the piriformis muscle is pinching the sciatic nerve. I apparently am a text book case.

Five years. My family practitioner at the outset told me nothing showed on the x-ray so there was really nothing to treat. A specialist had looked at an MRI and found some torn muscles in the region but nothing on which to perform to do surgery so take a pill and call in a month. Chiropractors, massage therapists. physical therapy - no one focused on the area I insisted was where the pain began.

Five years. An anesthesiologist and an acupuncturist. Even with the pain specialist I've gone through a pot full of pills and shots to no avail. It took awhile to pin point the problem though I think I explained it as well as the journal he showed me. One more shot is on tap. Botox. Hub is having a fine time with that one. Botox in my butt! It is funny. The pain isn't. The theory is that Botox will relax the muscle big time and release the pinch in the nerve. One hopes! Meantime physical therapy, especially stretches of that muscle, continues on and on and on.

Five years of having my life like nickel and dimed away by a lack of diagnosis and ineffective treatment. Funny, there is so much about the ailment on the Internet you'd think the doctors would have thought of it! Talk about having to be master of yourself and tenacious! If you don't want to settle for "there's nothing there" you've got to push and push and push.

One more shot. I hope it's not in the dark.

The Wisdom Of The Aged!

Jim Hightower's column on Grannies For Peace recently caught my attention. I read anything I see on seniors, especially women, making a difference!

In this particular case, it's a group of New Yorkers, not all women but mostly so. Not all seniors but mostly so. They range from a few in their fifties on up to their nineties. Many belong to various antiwar groups with "grannies" in their titles. Indeed, there are a lot of them all over the country. Research on the web can be a learning experience if you want it to be!

This particular group really intrigues me. They have gathered for over 330 consecutive Wednesdays, in every type of weather imaginable, to protest the Iraq and Afghanistan wars! They come while battling cancer, on their way to various appointments, on canes and walkers. They carry placards and hand out anti-war leaflets and chant "Bring our troops home - alive!" They tolerate tourists taking their pictures and commenting about "how cute" they are all because it gets the people's attention. It engages them. We should get as much from our government.

I think of the collective wisdom of this gathering of aging patriots, and patriots they are. If they feel that strongly about these wars, there's something to be said. Their wisdom comes from lives lived long. That they remain physically able to pursue their vigil week in and week out is awe inspiring; that they feel so strongly is awe inspiring, that they actually do it is awe inspiring.

How long has it been since your awe was inspired?

How Many Pills Would YOU Take?

Remember a few months ago when actress Brittany Murphey was found dead? Being an actress it was natural to think "drug overdose". Though they found prescription drugs in her system, it was determined an overdose was not the cause.

Today her distraught husband was found dead. Some of the prescriptions she took were found in his bedroom. It's too soon to know if his grief was so great he decided to follow her or that two young people, married, died within weeks of one another was a coincidence!

There was a time when I wondered how they got the number of drugs necessary to cause a death. I now know.

Those who follow me know I occasionally write of my problem of chronic pain. It's been five years now since the problem started. I've done everything asked of me. Physical therapy, massage, shots, etc. etc. ad nauseam. And pills. I think I've been on every non-narcotic pain and anti-inflammatory medication known to man. With no relief.

It started slowly. Adding one medication to another. Increasing the dosage. Still to no avail. Essentially we're working toward the implantation of a neurostimulator that sends electric impulses that block the pain. Before I get to that however, I have to try everything. That includes narcotic medications.

On my last visit I was given one such prescription. I asked if it was in lieu of what I was already taking. No, take them together until I feel I don't need the original pain killer. When I told Hub what was happening, he suggested in no uncertain terms that it should be absolutely the last resort. What about hypnotism or acupuncture from a practitioner not trying to rearrange you're life by selling you programs and products you neither want nor need?

I called the doctor and was told to forget hypnotism but was given the names of local acupuncturists. I was told to take the medicine too because of the time frame needed for acupuncture to work. I got on the handy dandy Internet to do some research and didn't like what I read.

Here's my problem. We're meeting friends from Great Britain in a couple of weeks and no doubt will want wine with our dinner. The following weekend we're meeting friends for a weekend of wine tasting. I hadn't planned on being the designated driver. But when I asked the nurse if any alcohol was allowed she said the medication affects the respiratory system as does alcohol and when over done people tend not to wake up. Maybe Ms. Murphey's husband? I'm remembering Heath Ledger. I think not.

So here's the decision. I'll struggle on as I am until the festivities with friends pass. I'll have started acupuncture by then and we'll see where it goes.

What I don't understand is why, if there is a device that is known to be effective, why one would be asked to take a narcotic before insurance or medicare would pay for the device! It makes no sense to me. I can give up my wine. That's not the issue. What is, is putting someone on a narcotic when it's not necessary. What point is proven?

I have no idea how this is going to shake out. I tried acupuncture before with poor results, but I'm firmly convinced the practitioner did not have my best interests in mind. I can but hope for better results with a doctor recommended one.

Will I take the narcotic for a month or so if necessary to satisfy medicare? I'm really not sure. Really. Not. Sure. What a position to be put in. Live with pain that is barely tolerable or take an addictive drug as a mere step toward no medication at all!

And they wonder why there is insurance and medicare fraud!

I Have No Hooray For HIPA!

I am eternally grateful the young Doctor I'm going to for pain has a good sense of humor. Through this five year process of trying to find the cause of and eventually cure the pain in my hip and buttocks has found me with a very short fuse.

Three more shots yesterday in specific spots marked by pen where it really hurts when pressed. That was more uncomfortable then the shots themselves! However the shots weren't a picnic either.

I told the Doctor I was very tired of being a pin cushion. This is a total of seven; the first four had no effect what-so-ever. Let's see. A brief recap. GP puts me on an Ibuprofen regime. Nothing. Physical therapy. Nothing. Acupuncture. Medicare doesn't pay, but basically nothing. Muscle relaxants. Nothing. Back to Physical therapy morphing to heavy duty massage therapy. Nothing.

I ask about a pain specialist and was told they don't treat cases like me. Live with it. As a consolation and at the urging of the PT I went to an orthopedic surgeon. Hadn't seen anything like it before and there was nothing to do surgery on so pop some pain pills and if I wanted try, a different PT. I did.

PT sent me to chiropractic who sent me for more message therapy of a different sort. Nothing. A back specialist. The first two shots. Nothing.

I changed GPs. "You need a pain specialist after all this." I'd have kissed him if his wife hadn't been in the room! All this has taken five years! Now we're trying to find where exactly the pain is coming from by process of elimination. Then treat it.

Here's part of the problem. HIPA! Because of that confounded privacy act doctors who you've been referred to have to have a release from you to share it with your GP. If you're then sent to another specialist the GP can't forward the records from the previous specialist. You have to request it. They expect seniors to be aware of all this what's more remember, over five years, who did what, when and where? Isn't it in the records? In a word, no.

Fortunately, I've learned to have test results, be it lab work, MRIs or x-rays sent to me. I had a copy of the MRI of my hip and when I realized my doctor hadn't access to it, gave it to him. "It says right here where the inflammation is," says he. We had a rather terse conversation about why the attending specialist didn't suggest it was out of his area but was in someone elses!

"This is where I tried to start five years ago!" Okay, this has gotten long enough. You certainly get the gist of it. I'm just tired. Tired from the onslaught of different medications they keep trying; very tired of hurting.

So yesterday's shots? I know enough to not even be cautiously optimistic. However, as I rose from bed very tentively this morning I felt different. I felt like someone had whacked that hip with a hammer, but it was a different sort of discomfort. When the lidocaine completely wears off who knows. Been there before.

I do know that Hub and I walked with more vigor this morning. I did my stretches and treadmill without the usual discomfort. And could rejoice that at least one of the Killdeer hatchlings made it through yesterday's horrific wind storm because it was out with it's parents when we returned from our walk. Hopefully there are more. I checked and there is an unhatched egg so who knows. Miracles can happen so I'm told.

Perhaps one day it will be my turn.

Inside Information

For most of the past five years I have had burning, aching pain in the areas shown in the illustration. I have changed family practitioners, gone to physical therapy ad nauseam, tried acupuncture and chiropractors, orthopedic surgeons and spine experts, all to no avail. Increasingly stronger doses of medications do not work. Finally, my current GP sent me to a chronic pain specialist.

Herein lies the story. It is not about my discomfort. It is, surprise, about the health care bill!

I was in this morning for my latest whammy; shots in both hips to see if we could quell at least some of the inflammation. While waiting my turn, the medical assistant asked me if I'd like something to read and laid a selection of magazines next to where I was sitting. An issue of Newsweek with Obama on the cover was on top. She turned it face down commenting that he wasn't very popular in that office of late.

Everyone in the room joined in the conversation. The Dr. doesn't understand how seniors can be happy with it considering the cuts.

The nurses all made a point of being concerned about both their salaries and benefits. You might say they just don't understand. I think that is beside the point. The fear is palpable and Obama running around the country still trying to sell it isn't helping.

The conversation turned to the reimbursements the doctors are now forced to live with and the increases coming. They talked about how family practitioners will no longer take chronic pain patients because they are a "pain". I was beginning to feel guilty being a Medicare patient on top of it!

Doctors are going to be leaving their profession looking for more lucrative opportunities. This particular doctor is thinking of creating a blog to talk about chronic pain and also, from what I've seen, help you wade through the information out there from a physicians perspective. At best it will be a difficult undertaking.

Staff? Those who are part time have decreased opportunity to go full time. Benefits, you know.

I've had similar conversations with the staff in my GP's office. They all have fear of what's ahead. My pain doctor had read my post where I commented I was off to see him while he still took Medicare. He laughed. I was dead serious.

Hub has for some time now thought I am a hypochondriac because none of the doctors and specialists I have been to have been able to pin point anything. I understand where he's coming from but he doesn't have the pain.

Then again, maybe he's right and it's all the fear factor in my head that the care may not be there when I really need it. I'm no longer sure. One thing I am sure of, however, Obama's ongoing campaign telling us we're going to love it won't ever convince me it's a good bill. It's not. That is not my imagination!

It would seem many in the medical community agree with me.

The President's Math Versus Mine

I really love it when two stories on the same day butt up against one another. Today they are on Yahoo . Obama seeks to reassure seniors on health care and Social Security to start cashing Uncle Sam's IOUs.

It seems Obama is in Ohio today trying to assure us his bill would make preventive care cost free and close the Medicare prescription gap. He goes on to say his proposal will add nearly a decade of solvency. First of all, nothing the government does is cost free! Forget that idea. Then, a decade of solvency? What? Then we have to go through all of this again? Or is it that he thinks we seniors will all be dead by then. He obviously isn't keeping track of the number of Boomers coming onto the rolls! I know for myself, I expect to be around for at least a decade, hopefully more!

Moving on to the next story, it tells us how this year is the first since the 1980s that Social Security will pay out more than it takes in. $29 billion more! This does not bode well.

Making matters worse is the fact that there are $2.5 trillion worth of IOUs from the government to Social Security. Heck, the national debt is $12 trillion and counting as I write this. We're talking real money here that is supposed to belong to us!

This of, course, creates another problem. If the demand to collect on those IOUs becomes reality there is no money. The government will have to borrow it from foreign investors! Sound familiar? I wonder what retirement communities in China are like.

Robbing Peter to pay Paul is nothing new and both parties are guilty. What angers me is that there is no money! We can't pay for what we are owed what's more foreign governments. Yet this administration is going full tilt to pass more legislation, full of special deals in the billions, that the people don't want.

I may not make it through another decade, but Mr. President, if I do, my voice will not be silenced. Unless you choose to do that too.

Eh?

I've come to the conclusion that my parents were far more healthy than I am. Even with the huge steps that have been made in the field of both preventive and curative medicine. My Mother, especially, may bear that out. She was 95 when she passed away. She still might be chugging along had her doctor been more vigilant, but then she was just an old lady.

To what did she attribute her long life? One was not running to the doctor with every little ailment. Two, was not loading her system with a myriad of drugs so as to confuse her body to the point of not being able to function. An aspirin now and then usually sufficed.

Another thing she wasn't exposed to was the vast number of advertisements of various remedies which had side effects worse than the ailment. Therefore she just didn't think about such things. Hub is much like her and considers me, with all my aches and pains which I continually try to sort out, as nothing more than a hypochondriac.

Look at what we're faced with. Everything from the health benefits of coffee, or not, to how often we should suffer through a mammogram.

What usually keeps us going through thick and thin is the old stand by. "Take an aspirin and call me in the morning!" Now we learn that aspirin could damage our hearing! How many of us have been told to add a baby aspirin to our health regime as an aid for a healthy heart!

Further research pointed out that those at greatest risk are men younger than 50. It's a far cry from what the headlines scream! Reading further I found what has proven to be the norm when it comes to headlines dealing with health. Contradictions or darn right reversals!

The Hearing Loss Web has an article that claims aspirin can prevent hearing loss from certain medications. Keeping up with all of this is more than I really care to do. I wish I could be more like Hub and ignore it.

I've learned, however, not to panic. Wait a few months and what had been dire is no longer. Whew.

My hearing is no longer what it used to be. It could be I just need my ears cleaned but I doubt it. I probably could do with hearing aids. After all, though no where near my Mother's age, I am in most circles considered old.

That's one thing I know for sure that aspirin can't cure, though it sure can make it more comfortable!

Up Yours!

What is the one exam people hate more than anything else? A colonoscopy, right?

President Obama has inadvertently shown exactly why we don't want a medicare type system for the country by virtue of his colonoscopy. You see, he had a virtual colonoscopy. If you're on Medicare, you can't. Dr. Mark E. Klein explained it quite well in Today's Wall Street Jounal . He explains that it takes about 15 minutes and requires no sedation. Though if polyps are found that have to be removed in a second procedure, only about 10% of people have them. It is also perfectly safe, eliminating the possibility of perforation and all that goes with that.

So why would this highly approved procedure be turned down in favor of the traditional one? Because it could "identify possible abnormalities outside the colon that might lead to further testing and additional costs". Hello? If they find something abnormal wouldn't you want to find out what it is and what to do about it? I would!

Then too, he goes on, there are the huge numbers of people who refuse to have the traditional procedure and that can lead to untimely death that's quite preventable!

I find it interesting that the President personally chose a procedure that those of us over 65 cannot have unless we're willing to pony up out of our own pockets. It wouldn't be because it's, in the long run, less expensive, more comfortable and, most importantly, safer.

How timely, as the health care war is heating up for the final battle. I fear we're not so much being governed as much as we're being ruled. There are privileges to being a part of the ruling class. Those of us who aren't part of it are close to having to live by their dictates while they enjoy the finest medical technology available.

And they wonder why we're angry.

Quit Playing 'Keep Away' With My Medicare!

We used to play 'keep away' with Bacchus all the time. When he grabbed the bone or the ball, however, the game was over. He had it, he was keeping it and that was that.

I feel much the same way about my Medicare! It's an imperfect system to be sure, but I need it and sorely resent Congress playing games with it in the health care debate. Not Medicare in of itself, understand, but Doctor reimbursements. On top of already ridiculously low reimbursements they are facing another 21% cut!

The Republicans are fighting the Democrat's attempt to add $200 billion to the deficit, according to an AP article in the Spokesman Review, in order to eliminate more huge cuts in payments to Doctors. It's one thing in this mess of a bill I would support!

The Republicans claim it's payback to the AMA for supporting the bill. The Democrats say "It's the right thing to do." I have little doubt it's both.

With all the areas in which deficit cuts can be made, this should not be one of them. Unless, of course, the idea that seniors are expendable is true. I, of course, resent that assumption. Remember none of them will have to live under Medicare.

Let's look at reality here. I have a Doctor who accepts Medicare patients. She advertises for new patients every week in the local paper. With all the seniors in the area needing a Doctor, one might wonder why. My guess is it's the way she handles her practice. When I go to see her I have 15 minutes. Period. I've learned to deal with that though I often have more than one issue I'd like to discuss. Fifteen minutes. Check the watch. Uh, that's it. Next time.

Most of us have better things to do with our time than to keep running to the Doctor. Especially if you live some distance away, as I do. So ailments I can live with get back benched. In the back of my mind is the nagging thought, "I hope it's an ailment I can 'live' with."

Here's the thing. I can go in and find no one other than myself in the waiting room. I then leave after my fifteen minutes, or less, and still no one occupies the waiting room. Why couldn't I have had twenty minutes and saved myself another trip? Is it because with the ridiculously small reimbursement she gets for that office visit, fifteen minutes is all it pays for? I would guess so.

You know what I would like to see? I'd like to see this handled separately from the overhaul. But then I'd like to see a lot of the issues handled separately from the overhaul. There are too many variants to be lumped together. The bill may pass but it will fail.

So may my health and well being. Unfortunately, unlike Bacchus and his Booda Bone, I may have my Medicare now, but two players are trying to take it away, each in their own way. I guess the next game we try will be 'tug of war'!